SAT作文求批改:People can be better off when they do not listen to criticism?1 Although some people believe that listening to criticism of others can benefit them a lot,many great men achieved their success by not listening to others criticism.

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SAT作文求批改:People can be better off when they do not listen to criticism?1 Although some people believe that listening to criticism of others can benefit them a lot,many great men achieved their success by not listening to others criticism.

SAT作文求批改:People can be better off when they do not listen to criticism?1 Although some people believe that listening to criticism of others can benefit them a lot,many great men achieved their success by not listening to others criticism.
SAT作文求批改:People can be better off when they do not listen to criticism?
1 Although some people believe that listening to criticism of others can benefit them a lot,many great men achieved their success by not listening to others criticism.We can see through the examples of Franklin Delano Roosevelt and Elizabeth Bennet that people can be better off even if they do not to criticism.
2 It is ignoring others’ criticism and keeping his own determination that lead to the success of Franklin Delano Roosevelt.Franklin Delano Roosevelt,the only U.S.president to have served more three terms,was a central figure of the 20th century during a time of worldwide economic crisis and world war.In 1932,during the Great Depression,Roosevelt advocated taking the New Deal.However,not only was his proposal criticized by his opponents,but also his disability caused by poliomyelitis was employed to attack him.Believing in himself that the Great Deal would eventually save the United States from the depression,he didn’t feel discouraged.Thanks to his optimism and resolution,Roosevelt beat Hoover and became the 32th president of the United States.Then after consulting with the Brain Trust,Roosevelt put up with the New Deal which can be concluded with “3R”:Recover,Relief and Reform.By establishing institutions and legislations such as “The emergency Banking Act” to govern the economy,by setting the price of the products,by providing social insurance to most citizens,the New Deal had successfully rebuild the people’s confidence in the government as well as the income of average people had been increased by 50%.If Roosevelt listened to his opponents criticism and give up the New Deal,he would be able to save the United Stated from the Great Depression.
3 It is Elizabeth Bennet’ s resolution to her own idea that lead to her successful marriage.Pride and Prejudice,a novel published by Jane Austen in 1813,follows the main character Elizabeth Bennet as she deals with issues of manners,upbringing,morality,education and marriage in the society of the early 19th-century England.In the novel,the main ambition of Mrs.Bennet,Elizabeth's mother,in life is to marry her daughters off well.Consequently,when Collins,a man who will inherit the assets of Bennet,proposes marrying Elizabeth,Mrs.Bennet agrees immediately and However,Elizabeth Bennet believes that social status and wealth are not necessarily advantages but the true love is the most significant.Holding her own perception confirmedly and didn’t listen to her parents criticism,she refuses to marry Collins.If Elizabeth Bennet comprised to marry her Collins,the marriages would be another tragedy beneath the sumptuous feint,just like that of Charlotte and Collins,as there was no love involved.
4 All in all,both examples of Franklin Roosevelt and Elizabeth Bennet illustrate that people can achieve more success if they neglect others criticism.Consequently,if we want to achieve success in the future,we should hold our own ideas firmly.
我今天SAT才出分,这是我的作文,只有7分,这应该与考场上写的差别不大。希望有人能指明我作文的问题并提出修改意见。我11月还有场考试,要怎么提高?目标10+
由于字数限制,每段只能用序号标注。

SAT作文求批改:People can be better off when they do not listen to criticism?1 Although some people believe that listening to criticism of others can benefit them a lot,many great men achieved their success by not listening to others criticism.
1 Although some people believe that listening to criticism of others can benefit them a lot,many great men achieved their success (by not listening to others criticism)(in a different way/an opposite way).We can see through the examples of Franklin Delano Roosevelt and Elizabeth Bennet that people can be better off even if they (do not to criticism)(take no notice of) criticism.
...“The emergency Banking Act” to govern the economy,by setting the price of the products,by providing social insurance to most citizens,the New Deal had successfully (rebuild) (rebuilt) the people’s confidence in the government as well as the (average) income of ( average) people had been increased by 50%.If Roosevelt (had) listened to his opponents criticism and (give) (given) up the New Deal,he (would be) (wouldn't have been) able to save the United ( Stated ) (States)from the Great Depression.
3 It is Elizabeth Bennet’ s resolution to her own idea that( lead) (leads) to her successful marriage.Pride and Prejudice,a novel (published) (written) by Jane Austen in 1813,follows the main character Elizabeth Bennet as she deals with issues of manners,upbringing,morality,education and marriage in the society of the early 19th-century England.In the novel,the main ambition of Mrs.Bennet,Elizabeth's mother,in life is to marry her daughters off well.Consequently,when Collins,a man who will inherit the assets of Bennet,proposes marrying Elizabeth,Mrs.Bennet agrees immediately and However,Elizabeth Bennet believes that social status and wealth are not necessarily advantages but ( the) true love is the most significant.Holding her own perception confirmedly and (didn’t listen to her parents criticism) (not having submitted herself to her parents' criticism),she refuses to marry Collins.If Elizabeth Bennet comprised to marry (her) Collins,the marriages would be another tragedy beneath the sumptuous feint,just like that of Charlotte and Collins,as there was no love involved.
4 All in all,both examples of Franklin Roosevelt and Elizabeth Bennet illustrate that people can achieve more success (as well even) if they neglect (others) (others') criticism.Consequently,if we want to achieve success in the future,we should hold our own ideas
firmly.(自己的想法是否永远正确?文章的结论给人印象是:听取别人批评意见是不可取的,是否有点以偏概全?只是随便说说,请楼主别在意!)
文章写得很好:论点明确,论据充分,层次分明,结论逻辑性强.如果再注意点语言细节,将是一篇不可多得的佳作

7分你还嫌少呢?你要进什么名校吗?
我觉得你写得不错啊

7分你还嫌少呢?你要进什么名校吗?
我觉得你写得不错啊